Apple unveils new product-unveiling product

March 06, 2007

Described in its patent filing as a ‘hype-generating mechanism with fully integrated Mac compatibility,’ the iLaunch is powered by Intel dual-core processors optimized to calculate a product’s gravitas. Apple claims the iLaunch can garner the same amount of press attention as a major scientific discovery, high court ruling, celebrity meltdown, or natural disaster at 200 times the speed of a traditional media-fostered launch.

The Onion strikes again.

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